This post originally appeared at Rebelle Society.

“So the darkness shall be the light, and the stillness the dancing.” – T.S. Elliot

The dance started way before our first memory. In our mothers’ womb, we danced to the beat of her heart. Silently and slowly, we surfed the universal pulse.

As a child, this pulse shaped our moves and we made our first memories as a dancer. Mine was when I was about five years old, taking one of my first ballet classes. I was concentrating on mastering my first demi plie and the next thing I notice, I’m standing in a big pool of pee – yes, I peed in my pants. I was so embarrassed that I ran out of the room and my ballerina fantasies were finito.

Since then I have danced in the dark, gloomy clubs for men consumed by their own fantasy. I have taken off my dress in front of hundreds of eyes ready to make me part of their fantasy. I have felt the smoky walls collapsing over me in the early morning hours. I have danced for the sake of my own healing, growth and ignorance.

I have spent hours in champagne rooms fulfilling someone’s broken dreams (unsuccessfully). I have made money. I have eaten burgers in Chelsea diners at 5 a.m. before riding my bike back home on an empty 5th Avenue. I have counted twenty dollar bills and placed them on my altar before falling asleep right before the first rays of sun hit my pillow. I have woken up right on time for an early dinner to repeat it all again.

I have danced for Krishna and Radha. I have danced on the streets shouting their names. I have danced in deep devotion in temples at sunrise, intoxicated by the smell of fresh flowers and sandalwood. My longing had no limits. I was yearning for my body to be a temple for eternal love.

I have danced blindfolded and I have danced in a desert for four nights around fire without food. I have danced for world peace and I have danced for the peace of my own mind.

I have also sat for hours moving only my own breath; days and years of meditating, expanding into that formless space beyond my everyday reality. I have seen a lot of light there. In this formless presence I have let go most of my expectations and hopes and bullshit—not because I wanted to, but because I had no choice.

I have worshipped the body to the point of exhaustion. I have worshipped my Spirit to the point of isolation.

The time of worship has come to end. No more extremes. Meet me in the horizon, where the unity of the two knows no pretense. Meet me on this stage where Heaven asks you for a dance and your Earthly yes is so clear that it shakes away anything and everything you were planning on holding onto for future’s sake.

Because you know this new home knows no future.

The beat is a lover that never disappoints and, like all lovers, it demands 100% surrender. It has the power to seduce moves we couldn’t dream. It grabs us by the belly, turns us inside out and leaves us abruptly begging for more. We love beats that move faster than we can think, beats that drive us ever deeper inside, that rock our worlds, break down walls and make us sweat our prayers. Prayer is moving. Prayer is offering our bones back to the dance. Prayer is letting go of everything that impedes our inner silence. God is the dance and the dance is the way to freedom and freedom is our holy work. ~ Gabrielle Roth

How do we dance ourselves to such a state of openness that in the end there is just pure knowing? How do we dance with such purity that it is impossible for our spirit not to penetrate our flesh? How do we dance with such rapture that when the dance is over, we have moved into a new reality, a new future? How can we dance in a way that whatever it is that we are still resisting, is swallowed and digested by the beat of your own heart?

In a trance, the mind dissolves into nothingness. When you allow your body to dissolve into an active prayer, you have the forces of nature behind you. And when you dance with your eyes closed, you have the power of your own soul assisting you.

For some people, the word “trance” is frightening. But trance is really nothing more than another word for meditation. It’s the state of no mind. Meditation is the state of no mind. The question is, how do you get to that state? When you meditate, you sit in silence for extended periods of time until the mind empties out and you become an empty vessel. Then your spirit can move in. Trance is the same way except the doorway is different. It’s done through catharsis. It’s done through rhythm, sound and movement of the body. And what occurs either in that movement or at the end of that movement is trance, a very deep meditation. Trance and meditation are the same except the path is different. In shamanic cultures, they used trance and in the East they used contemplation and meditation. ~ Wilbert Alix

When you dance this way, there is no place within you that you cannot enter. You may not want to move your body at all, because if you do, you know there is no going back. Resistance is frozen, allowance is fluid.

If you move, you become vulnerable—you have taken your first step out of your own resistance, your own illusory protection. There you are, blindfolded, heading to the unknown that may very well bring you back to the lost pieces of your soul.

Dance into the dark. It is in the dark that the mystery is captured, the pearls are made and the dawn is born.

“Like all vibrant elements of nature human beings grow in the light and transform in the dark.” – Wilbert Alix

“Meditation hasn’t got a damn thing to do with anything, ’cause all it has to do with is nothing. Nothingness. Okay? It doesn’t develop the mind, it dissolves the mind. Self-improvement? Forget it, baby. It erases the self. Throws the ego out on its big brittle ass. What good is it? Good for nothing. Excellent for nothing. Yes, Lord, but when you get down to nothing, you get down to ultimate reality. It’s then and exactly then that you’re sensing the true nature of the universe, you’re linked up with the Absolute, son, and unless you’re content with blowing smoke up your butt all your life, there’s the only place to be.” ~ Bobby Case

Meditation is a risky business. When you become really good at it, you may end up risking all your previous hard work and reputation. You drop your titles, your trainings, your need to prove you have been there and done that. Why?

Because when you get real with yourself, you get real with the world.

All veils melt away and all that remains is only this: Space. No more here and there, just this. Nakedness. Nowhere to hide because there is nothing to hide. Nothing to prove because there is nothing to prove. Nowhere to go because there is nowhere to go, really. Just here.

Past and future disappear before they even enter the horizon. You try to grasp and it all slips away. You try to hold on to someone but they are gone. You try to manipulate something and it comes back and hits you right on your face. You want something so badly that it makes you throw up. And there you are, cleaning up the mess of your wanting.

Because you forgot that what you are wanting is only a future reflection of your current vibrational state.

Please do not go woo-woo on me.

It simply means that there is nothing out there in the world that cannot belong to you, but in order to have it, you need to match it, my love. You need to get out of your mind. You cannot give it form too soon, and you cannot define it too much. Pretend that you already have what you want, and find an energetic twin, or a version of that. It can show up as a color, a symbol or pure feeling tone. (Energy does not speak English.)

Once you get what it is, then be it. Step into it, embody it, and surround yourself with it. Dance with it. But please, I beg you, do not try to control it, manipulate it or make it yours too soon. Trust your powers. Only hold on to your intention of what you want, and as for the rest: drop it. Let it go.

Stop whining about things you do not have, because dear heart, you are being heard. It is already on its way. Do not ask for something and then change your mind.

Receive, baby. Open your arms and let yourself have it. All the way. To the deepest, softest, juiciest and ecstatic corner of your inner temple, open the door, for God’s sake. Make some tea. Sit down and ask: can I pour you some, too?

We resist the present moment because there is not much that is happening in the present moment. It drives our mind nuts, because our mind wants to solve problems, and figure shit out. Thank God for that.

But it gets tricky only if we think there is always something to figure out—kind of like if you were to think that you need to lie down under your car all day long, waiting and watching if something goes wrong, before you can go for a ride.

Let me get this clear: I am not talking about existential nihilistic nothing, that sees life with no meaning, no purpose, and no point. I am not talking about a transparency a la Jean Baudrillard that has become borderline depressing, too dull and indifferent to leave any room for the divine presence to occupy the emptiness:

“The apocalypse is finished, today it is the precession of the neutral, of forms of the neutral and of indifference…all that remains, is the fascination for desertlike and indifferent forms, for the very operation of the system that annihilates us. Now, fascination (in contrast to seduction, which was attached to appearances, and to dialectical reason, which was attached to meaning) is a nihilistic passion par excellence, it is the passion proper to the mode of disappearance. We are fascinated by all forms of disappearance, of our disappearance. Melancholic and fascinated, such is our general situation in an era of involuntary transparency. — Jean Baudrillard, Simulacra and Simulation, “On Nihilism”, trans. 1995

I am talking about the kind of nothing where we go to discover our meaning, our true potential and reason for being. I am talking about the ultimate freedom from suffering, and from everything that we are not.

How do we do nothing in the culture that is full of everything? How do we access nothing in a society that worships bigger, better and faster? How do we stay still when we are surrounded by chaos? How do we replace indifference with neutrality? How do we learn to love without conditions when most of our agreements are built on conditions? How do we remain in the state of wonder without being swallowed by curiosity?

How can we become so passionate about God’s love that your lover needs to knock on God’s door before entering your Heart?

Right now, close your eyes, and find out how many thoughts, concepts and beliefs—yours or other people’s—are shooting across your mind like you had built a freeway inside your head, available to host anybody and anything? How many? 10? 50? 1000?

Nothing is not about sitting around being useless, but being in full action, while being a host only to the guidance you receive directly from your own divine and authentic core. It is about being so empty that whenever something arises, you know it is something original, something uniquely you, something that is fully aligned with your magnificence. You have a filter system in your mind that recognizes what is yours and what is not.

And this takes practice. Yes, practice.

“I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free” – Michelangelo 

Just like David, you already have it all inside you. There is nothing out there that will fill your sense of lack. It is the chipping away of anything that is not you that will set you free.

 But it is often that freedom itself that scares the shit out of us.

So we keep resisting the one thing that could give us what we so desperately want.

May this guided meditation give you a glimpse of your own Nothing. Use it to hold onto your Nothing – because “it is the silence between the notes that makes the music; it is the space between the bars that holds the tiger.” (Old Saying)

(The affirmation in the beginning of this audio is from Spirit Coach® Training.)

“But, if you have nothing at all to create, then perhaps you create yourself.” ~ Carl Jung

 

Sitting, doing nothing, creating nothing.

Feeling useless, an outsider, a failure.

Been there.

Keep holding the tension between doing and not doing, dear one.

Somewhere between the two, a star is being born.

(This post was published on Rebelle Society )

There comes a time in our lives
when we become too big for our comfort zone.
We become too bold for the ordinary.

Something within us wants to rise beyond our status quo.

The question is not whether this moment comes or not,
but what we choose to do when it does.

Will you choose to keep going like nothing happened,
or will you choose to feel uncomfortable, awkward and
like a stranger to yourself in order to discover
what else there is to this mystery called Life?

There was nothing casual about me going to Nicaragua for three weeks, I heard. Well, I thought it was just a trip, a routine break, a new challenge and experience and an opportunity to throw myself into the unknown while eating bananas for breakfast and Gallo Pinto for dinner.

But other people did not seem to view it the same way. I had mixed reactions from clients and friends when I told them I chose Nicaragua from all the places someone could go to have ‘a vacation’. The funny thing is that the word ‘vacation’ does not belong to my dictionary anymore, if it ever did.

The word ‘vacation’ comes from Latin vacare (vacatio = freedom, exemption), based on the assumption or idea that we are only free when we are not working, or when we have ‘time off’.

Why would I ever choose to go to a place that is ‘dangerous’ and so ‘uncool’ to chill and be free? It sounded more like work to many people. The truth is, there is no more ‘time off’ for me. It is all the same:

One long moment with some artificial breaks here and there, but in truth, this is it. My mind is no longer willing to divide time into sections, my mind no longer looks forward only to certain experiences, which in a way may feel quite unexciting, yet I have never been more thrilled about my life than I am now.

I was also told I was very brave to go alone to a new country. Let me tell you what is brave. Brave is when you raise kids, when you love deeply, when you are capable of being attached to another human being without grasping and needing anything from them. Brave is when you prepare your own food from whatever you have, and feel like a queen. Brave is when you see the brightness in everything life throws at you. Brave is when you walk your talk, provide a living for yourself and your loved ones and do not complain. Brave is when you love for love’s sake.
Going to a new country alone does not feel like bravery to me (even when I do not speak a word of Spanish). It is a way for me to stay fresh. Switch boxes, from one that has got too comfortable into a new one that feels more aligned, fresh and suitable to who I am now.

Routine takes bravery, and so does breaking it. What if I have nothing to return to? Well, that is the point. What if? Willingness to let it all go is the ingredient to shine and be sexy and shameless.

I did have a curiosity about one thing prior to my trip. I wanted to experience the jungle. For a Nordic girl, just the word ‘jungle’ gives me chills. Excitement. Fear. Wild and untamed. Exotic beyond my understanding. A complete opposite of the frozen, still and dark land I call my home. I wanted to practice doing nothing in the jungle. I wanted to test my daily meditation tools in a new environment.

How badly will I fail?

I learned that the jungle is the opposite of Nothing, yet it is Life in its simplest form. It becomes complicated only if I demand order and comfort the way I am used to at home. And this is the sweet spot: to adapt to my environment without losing my center.

Without losing my connection to Spirit. It was humbling to lose it anyway. In some weird way, I had agreed to the jungle’s way to purify me. I got a terrifying virus for 24 hours that made me ache and sweat so hard that I could not move. I had nightmares that woke me up every five minutes. That was the longest night I ever had, hallucinating in my hammock, monkeys laughing loudly in the background at my humanness.

To be brave is to follow your guidance – your guts – and not question it, rather throw yourself in with full faith while holding your intention high and bright. The only thing that can go wrong is everything. And you do it anyway, because deep down you know there is no such thing as ‘wrong’ when you are on the path of learning, growing and waking up.

Nicaragua was a teacher, a lover and a new best friend. It left me soft, sun-kissed and feeling deeper freedom within myself. The two volcanos (one was called ‘fire’ and the other one was called ‘water’) on Ometepe island taught me about giving and receiving, and how it is time for me to bring them into harmony in my life. How can I receive more gracefully and more willingly what is waiting to be given to me?

Thank you Life. Thank you God. Thank you every little freaky crawler that scared the shit out of me in the jungle. I know you were just doing your part in helping me take my next step.

“Not all who wander are lost.” – J.R.R. Tolkien

Wherever you go today, watch your step.
Watch how you move through the space in front of you.
Is there room for the world to meet you there?
Are you open enough to respond to the sounds, the smells and the invitations that it offers?
Are you flexible enough to turn left when you meant to turn right?

Or do you keep going, your chest shrunk into a raisin,
your face determined to reach your destination?

I wonder if there is a way to hold your intention so strongly
that you can rest in it, trust it and be certain that
it will take you there?

Even when you wander?

Even when you allow your surroundings be part of your journey?

This post was published on Rebelle Society – visit the site: it is fabulous, rebellious & it rocks!

We all know how to flirt. We all know how to be our best self 
when it comes to love, attraction and intimacy.
Especially in the beginning…

Getting to know your True Self,
the part of you that is connected to the Divine at all times,
is not much different from dating.

If you want to keep the momentum going with the person you like,
you need to keep showing them you are interested, right?
Pick up the phone once in a while and don’t just wait for them to call.
Or pay a compliment, the kind that comes straight from your heart.

It is really no different when it comes to spiritual practice.
The most amazing thing about your Spirit, though, is that
it is always there, waiting for your whisper and ready to play and
create with you.

I hope this list will inspire you to find your own unique ways to get
closer to your Spirit.

1. First thing in the morning, I get centered, clear and connected.
This is my way of telling my Spirit, “Hey, I’m up
and available to dance with you!”
(Get your free 5 minute guided meditation here.)

2. I keep bowls full of tealight candles around my house. The little
ritual of lighting a candle anchors me and encourages me to take a
moment to stop.

3. I read my favorite poems again and again. And then one more time.

4. Dance. The wilder the better.

5. Touch or be touched. Massage or be massaged.

6. Pure essential oils like myrrh, frankincense and palo santo. Right
on the top of your head.

7. A prayer. It can go like this: “Dear (God/Creator/Great Mystery/x),
I have no idea what I am supposed to do next. Can you please direct
me? Thanks.” The key is to really mean it. Yearn for the answer.
Get on your knees, if you have to. Be anywhere but in your head.
Remember, you can’t get what you want unless you are w i l l i n g
to show up.

8. Laugh. Often. With strangers. In the grocery store. In the post
office. In the places where you least expect it. That’s where it is
most needed. Laughter that comes from your heart raises your
vibrational field, sometimes more quickly than 30 minutes of
meditation.

9. I prepare food with love. I chant while making it. I use only the
best ingredients. Organic. Exotic. Decadent. Flavors that make you
go aaaaaHHHH. Saffron. Durian. Pure raw Tahitian vanilla beans.
Gruyere. Sun-dried olives.

10. Releasing resentment. Any old stuff that you still hold on to. I
mean, imagine going out with someone for the first time and all
this person talks about is his/her ex-partner? How attractive is
that? You need to be willing to release anything that you are
holding on to in your energy field in order to access your Spirit
directly. If you don’t, you end up feeling stuck and disconnected.

Now it’s your turn. Please let me know your favorite ways to get connected.
What keeps you going? I would really like to hear.

Sending love + brilliant light,

Riikka

image by spitonyou

What a beautiful morning it is! Not sure which shines brighter, the sun or my christmas tree. Or my heart: I feel my dad’s words this morning. Last year right around the time he was leaving his body I found an old christmas card from him, and these are the words written on the card:

Not sure if my translation will be capturing the meaning correctly but it says: light develops the fruits of goodness, justice and truth. These words come from a man that had seen the dark, and usually didn’t talk about things like this. So, this morning I hold this message close to my heart. Be in the light. Watch your garden grow beauty and deliciousness. Merry Christmas Dear Ones!!

23.

I saw the angel in the marble and I carved until I set him free. – Michelangelo

Keep chipping away those layers that you are not.
Keep polishing that marble of yours.

I see you.

You can choose to continue hiding,
or you can choose to let me know you can see you, too.

Your call.

22.

Nothing makes the earth seem so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes.
Henry David Thoreau

Today I will send post cards to three friends who
make the earth seem so spacious to me.

Let’s make that today’s meditation.

When you mindfully stick the stamp on that card,
say a prayer or a blessing for each person
that will touch it or it will pass by
before it gets to its destination.

You just created a ripple of light across the planet.

Not a small thing.

image by: hippopotomi

21.

20.

Genius is the ability to receive from the universe. -I Ching

Gratitude creates space within to receive what we have gone without.

Gratitude opens up a chamber for the universe to come in,

like a Santa Claus sliding through the chimney bearing gifts,

dreams come true, manifestations of our most perfect life.

Take a pen and write 10 things you appreciate about yourself.

Don’t be shy. You have done so much good.

It has not gone unnoticed.

Except maybe by you.

Take a look.

Now.

19.

‎Spare yourself from seeking love, approval, or appreciation—from anyone. And watch what happens in reality, just for fun. - Byron Katie

If you knew how loved, approved and appreciated you already are, you would blow your own mind out of the window.

That is how magnificent you are.

So stop seeking it, and if you still have to,
seek it from yourself.

18. 

Sometimes you just have to take the leap and build your wings on the way down. -Rumi

The higher the jump, the more time you have.
So don’t worry.

If it is only a small leap, you still have time.
So don’t worry.

17.

Not all who wander are lost. J.R.R. Tolkien

Wherever you go today, watch your step.

Watch how you move through the space in front of you.
Is there room for the world to meet you there?

image 

16.

This is true joy in life, being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the being force of nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy. I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work, the more I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake. Life is no “brief candle” to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.
-George Bernard Shaw

Your life is a legacy. Your foot steps matter. Match them accordingly.

15. 

We are shaped and fashioned by what we love. -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

I love sunsets, so does that make me a lover of all endings?
I love sunrises, so does that make me a lover of all beginnings?
I love the moon, so does that make me a lover of everything between?

14.

Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go. - T.S. Elliott

How far is too far?

Stretch beyond your limits and find out.

If you can’t find your way back,
you either got lost or
you found a place you would
rather call home.

13. -St. Lucia Day 

If you are irritated by every rub, how will your mirror be polished?
-Rumi

This one made me go “ouch!”

But this is what Nothing can do to us–
it makes us go “ouch” sometimes.

Nothing invites us to confront ourselves, no doubt.
And until we see the benefits of this in real life,
it may seem irritating and like a waste of time.

Meditation has helped me take responsibility
(even when everything in me was screaming
NO, DON’T DO IT!),
and not feel like a victim of any circumstance.

The blaming finger protecting the little self–
ready to point at someone “out there”–
gets replaced by a bigger perspective, the Self.

When we are willing to rub our own shell,
our inner pearl finally starts to shine.

image source

12.

…wanting soul life without the dark, warming intelligence of
personal doubt is like expecting an egg without the brooding heat of the mother hen.― David Whyte

List your doubts today. Write them down. Meditate on them.

Embrace every single one.
Even the ones that bring you the most discomfort.

It is in that doubt that the (unshakable) certainty is born.

11.

Try again. Fail again. Fail better. - Samuel Beckett

If something goes wrong today,
dive fully into it.

Bathe in all the sensations
that failing is making available to you.

Please don’t resist it because even failure is delivered to you
with pure intentions, such as growth, learning, empowerment.

So let it be.

10. 

9.

Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson

Bring someone flowers today.

Bathe in the glory of the electricity created by happiness.

8.

Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was often times filled with your tears.
– Kahlil Gibran

The depth of your deepest sorrow
is the height of your highest joy.

Treat sorrow as your most honored guest.

(Returning guests often come bearing gifts.)

7.

I like the silent church before the service begins, better than any preaching. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

We are all made out of the same silence.

There are times when words can bring us closer,
and times when they make us feel separate from each other.

The more sacred a space is, the louder it speaks when silent.

Words only become like a marshmallow,
filling without sustenance.

6.

In the universe, there are things that are known, and things that are unknown, and in between, there are doors. - William Blake

Today, I have deep gratitude for doors.
They always remind me of my a choice either to open them or keep them shut.

Not all of them are meant to be opened.
Not all of them are meant to be closed.

Which side of the door are you today?

(Photo: Bubblefield-photo)

5.

I do not like the idea of happiness – it is too momentary – I would say that I was always busy and interested in something – interest has more meaning to me than the idea of happiness. -Georgia O’Keefe

Whenever we are occupied with something that makes our heart sing,
we are no longer searching for any particular outcome,
but instead we are merged with something greater than ourselves.

Some may call it being happy, enthusiastic or ecstatic.
Some may call it being one with All.

We have become the thing that we are wanting.

It is not dependent on any outside influence
but our inner ability to remain in this connection.

Happiness is an inside job.

4.

Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside of us while we live.
– Norman Cousins

Watch your breath today.

Notice when you hold it just a moment too long.
Watch what just died inside of you.
A dream? Vision? Hope?

Watch how you can bring it back to life
by simply choosing it again. And again.

3.

Notice the moment when love is exchanged for chaos in your world.

- Byron Katie

Love reminds us of all the different moments
when we have felt unloved.

It is no wonder love brings chaos with it:
He loves me, he loves me not.

Next time you notice that happens,
say: I love me, I love me not.

Love is not a thrift store on Halloween eve.

Love is a mirror. Love is you.

2.

Some things cannot be spoken or discovered until we have been stuck, incapacitated, or blown off course for awhile. Plain sailing is pleasant, but you are not going to explore many unknown realms that way.
 – David Whyte

There comes a time in our lives
when we become too big for our comfort zone.
We become too bold for the ordinary.
Something within us wants to rise beyond our status quo.

The question is not whether this moment comes or not,
but what we choose to do when it does.

Will you choose to keep going like nothing happened,
or will you choose to feel uncomfortable, awkward and
like a stranger to yourself in order to discover
what else there is to this mystery called Life?

1.

Life is pretty simple: You do some stuff. Most fails. Some works. You do more of what works. If it works big, others quickly copy it. Then you do something else. The trick is the doing something else. 
- Leonardo da Vinci

Keep it simple today.
Do nothing.
Trust that from that Nothing,
something arises.
Something original.
Something that has never been before.
Only you know what this is.

Surprise us.

Huffington Post’s recent article Stress Symptoms: 8 Surprising Signs You’re Maxed Out
made me realize how many people find this season extremely stressful. Here at the Milk Bar, we are taking it pretty easy at the moment. Hopefully these 10 simple tips will help you make this season more enjoyable.

1. Write a letter of gratitude to yourself. Remind yourself that you rock. By acknowledging yourself and everything that you do and everything that you are, you allow yourself to receive more love and support from the universe.

2. Turn off your phone and stay off-line one full day of the week. For some, this may sound completely impossible, but it is not. You are in charge of your own life and your own well-being. Do not tell yourself otherwise.

3. Sit 5-10 minutes daily, eyes closed, just breathing. This can be done anywhere, even in your car. You do not need any special place or time for this. Get grounded by visualizing being inside a giant redwood tree that is connecting you to the core of the earth. Get used to this sense of support that is always there. Grounding takes you away from the past and the future, brining you fully into the present time. In this moment, when grounded in your body, stress does not exist.

You may also choose to visit the Temple Room for some quiet time.

4. Take a walk around the block. Once a day, take a walk in the neighborhood. 10 minutes will do. Focus only on things you appreciate: the colorful holiday decorations, the blue sky, the bright orange leaves under your step. When your mind wanders, simply bring it back to what is in front of you.

5. Book a massage, acupuncture, reflexology session ahead of time or exchange massages with your partner or a friend. Foot massage done with peppermint lotion works miracles! Or, find a sauna or steam room and sweat!

6. Sign up for yoga, pilates or dance classes. Pay a full month of membership upfront to stay motivated. It’s worth it.

7. Sleep. Be in bed by 11pm. Create a bedtime ritual for yourself that calms your mind: take a salt bath with lavender oil, drink chamomile tea, read poetry or your favorite book, write in your journal, play with your cat or dog, massage your belly with warm Castor oil or sesame oil, light a candle, say a prayer….do whatever helps you to feel calm and relaxed. Keep your window slightly open at night for extra dose of oxygen.

8. Start your day by setting a clear intention. Or read a prayer that is dear to you. Here is one of my favorites that helps me step out of my own way and be in service for whatever is in alignment for everyone involved and to move from doing into allowing:

“Oh, beloved Mother Father God, use me, mould me, let me be your instrument. Beloved Mother Father God, creator of all that is… take my hand and guide it to where it performs its highest good. Through my mouth speak words of truth. Through my hands allow me to touch, heal, transform others. Through my eyes shine rays of love. Through my heart, guide me to give your greatest service. Through my being, allow me to live your highest purpose. Guide me to my right place today, with the right words, the right actions. Guide me where I can be your smile to ease someone’s heartache, your healing power to ease someone’s pain. What words of your wisdom would you have me say? What is it you would have me do this moment, this day, this lifetime? Beloved Mother Father God, creator of all that is… this is the day that you have made. Let me celebrate it. Let me be your emissary. Let me exalt in your love. Let me be a living, breathing, walking representation of your love. Let me share this with every being I see today- uplifting and inspiring the to do the same.” -Mary A Love Story, 2008 by Marianne Stevens

9. Stay hydrated. Drink lots of hot or warm clean water, ideally with lemon, and first thing in the morning. Our increased exposure to the drying nature of interior heating systems makes us easily dehydrated. If you are a coffee drinker, switch to green tea every other day. Be kind to your adrenals.

10. Nourish yourself with regular, highly nutritious meals and snacks. Add soups and stews, root vegetables, beans, miso and seaweed, garlic and ginger to your diet. Do not skip breakfast, but make it your most important meal. It will ground you and help you keep your blood sugar levels even until lunch. My latest quick breakfast is a porridge that I make from quinoa flakes. It literally takes 2 minutes: Simply simmer 3/4 cup quinoa flakes in 2 cups of water for 2 minutes. Add coconut butter and dried or fresh fruit or soaked prunes on the top. Maybe some cinnamon. Super yummy.

Bonus points: Laugh often, play, hug your Christmas tree, wear holiday socks you would never ever normally wear, give homemade Christmas chutney as a present to your friends and family.

image source

Here in the Milk Bar, those lazy summer hours seem to be for hibernation, 
and winter is when things happen.

The darker and the shorter the days,
the more alive I become. The more my Nordic cells remember;
the more my heart feels.

Here, we stretch our well-rested limbs when the stores start playing
the phoney melodies and when the windows dress up in their kitschy costumes.
Simply because Christmas has always been so dear to my heart.

When growing up in Finland,
the dark December mornings had special, sparkly magic to them.
Each morning I got to open a new window in my “Joulukalenteri,”
an Advent calendar, and each window had a message in a form of a picture,
quote or a chocolate (if I was lucky).

This year, I want to bring back my most sacred childhood tradition
and the Milk Bar will turn into a “Joulukalenteri” for the next 24 days.
Each day, you will find a spirit message that will open us to receive the healing
that this holiday season brings and offers to us.

This is also to honor my dad, who no longer is here with me.
Through the Milk Bar Joulukalentari, I want to express my gratitude
for each childhood Christmas Eve
that was always full of innocence, peace and laughter.

This laughter is still alive within me.

Please join me to celebrate this holy season
by going inward, by taking a step closer to what truly matters to you,
and by knowing that your unwavering presence is the best gift you can ever give to those around you.

Sometimes life takes us to the undercurrent of all things, a place where we often start questioning if this is really worth it. This life. Living. Where we have no direction, no answers being mailed to our doorsteps, no one to hold our hand and say it will be OK. We all visit this place from time to time. It tests our ability to trust and ask for guidance. Most of us would rather figure it out all by ourselves. We’ve got this brilliant mind, designed to solve problems, so why not?

But the mind, unfortunately, is limited. Even the most brilliant minds only see the world from one narrow perspective. It’s kind of like being lost in a jungle. Your entire focus is on the next obstacle; perhaps fear takes over, and you go into survival mode. You have no idea how to get out of the jungle, and you start to panic. But if you were in an airplane looking down, you would see that you were really close to town, really close to being out of the jungle and safe. This is the perspective of our Spirit (Self) when we are in a stressful situation. It sees what we cannot see with our limited mind. And we can access this part of us by asking for guidance. Praying. By dissolving our “I know it all, and even if I don’t, I’m too embarrassed to tell anyone about it, including the Universe” attitude.

Here’s a story about how I had to face the limitations of my own mind and get on my knees to pray for a change.

It was 2003 and I had just moved to San Francisco. I had left New York City behind, and landed in San Francisco on Halloween, dressed as Cleopatra.

(Yes, that’s me in the picture.)

I really had no clue why I was here or what I was supposed to do. Surrounded by all these strangers dressed up in weird outfits, I figured if I wanted to start a new life, this would be the way to do it! Anything felt possible, and I felt safe under my mask, wig, and powerful persona.

Waking up the next day without the wig, however, was a different story. In the midst of these hungover strangers, I felt far away from Cleopatra. Surely I had had an impressive entrance to my new life, yet I had not thought any further than that. So the following few weeks were tough. My cousin, who lived in Berkeley, had offered me a place to stay for a week, and after two weeks, I knew it was time to go. I felt his skepticism (I don’t blame him!) in my ability to find an apartment, especially when I had only a few hundred dollars in my pocket. I managed to sound very confident when I told him that I would move out the next day. And so I did. I found a young gentleman in a coffee shop that day who basically gave me keys to his apartment. This gracious human being was clearly sent by one of my angels. He did not want anything in return; quite the opposite, he made sure I had privacy and a comfy room to call my own for the months to come.

So here I was, living in a brand-new apartment on Valencia Street in San Francisco. I hardly ever saw this young gentleman because of his unusual work schedule. I had everything I needed, except money. Well, I was also still lacking the answer to my question, What the hell am I doing here? But that didn’t seem to matter so much. When we are in survival mode, our grand life purpose is not really our first concern. I remember taking quarters from a pile I saw this young gentleman had left by the door so that I could get a bite to eat or take BART somewhere. Every time I did, I made a promise to put back every single coin when I had money again.

But my days started to get more and more desperate. Looking back now, I know I was suffering from a deep depression. I spent my days in a local bookstore, sitting on the floor reading books and magazines. I ate samples from the organic salad bar and wrote poetry in coffee shops. Every day seemed like a repeat of the day before. I spent my last few hundred dollars on a psychic back on the East Coast, because she had promised to remove some kind of curses on me if I sent her money! I was too naive and too depressed to question her honesty and integrity. I needed help. So I accepted it from wherever, in whatever form.

The day came when I had had enough. It was a Sunday afternoon and I had decided to put aside all the promises I had made to never be a stripper again. I started walking toward a strip club I had seen downtown. Every step weighed a thousand pounds. I kept telling myself, just one night. I can make $1,000 and never go back again. This would be enough to get started. No matter how hard I tried, I could not rationalize my plan. But I also didn’t seem to know how to talk myself out of it. It seemed like the best thing to do, considering my level of desperation. I was going back to something that was against my nature, and it felt like I was about to visit a vibration that didn’t match me anymore. Tears burned in my eyes as I walked down Market Street toward the strip club. I felt like a complete failure. Here I was in the big wild world trying to prove to myself that I could do this. Meanwhile, my friends back home in Finland were probably thinking I was living such a luxurious life traveling around the world! Ha!

Something inside me moved and softened, and I heard myself talking out loud. I had started to pray. Well, it was more like a demand for help rather than a sweet prayer! I remember saying, “Dear God, tell me what to do. Right now. Not five minutes from now, but RIGHT NOW.” I looked down and saw a piece of folded paper on the ground. I picked it up and opened it. This is what I saw:

This was my answer. It arrived right then and there. Big fat tears started to flow down my cheeks. I could not help but notice that the name of the first person on the left was Krishna. I had been a lover of Krishna for years, and spent a lot of my time in NYC in the temples devoted to Krishna. Then I saw the word Family written in the center. I felt my future children looking at me and whispering in my ear: Do the right thing, Mom! We are coming! I found myself turning around and starting to walk back to the apartment. I never looked back.

Over the next few days, my life started to change. I got a job at Tartine, an amazing French bakery in the Mission district. I was able to leave the generous young gentleman’s apartment and start my own life, slowly but surely. I moved to Marin County, where I found my true community, and I have lived there ever since.

The deeper message I found in this experience is that even in the most desperate situations, we are always connected to our true Self, the part of us that already knows the answer and already sees the solution and outcome. It is like the future Self knocking on our door, coming to greet us and bring us back in alignment with our true purpose. It takes trust to know that this connection is always present, even when we cannot see it, and act based on that fact by asking for help through a simple prayer.

This little person Kajal was my angel and my guide in a human body. One day I hope to meet her. My wish is that someone will recognize her in this drawing and I can return it to her. Kajal is a Hindi word for kohl, a kind of eyeliner. We line the eyes to make them stand out. In my case, Kajal reframed my vision so I was able to see the Truth.


By learning tools and techniques that help you see yourself as a Spirit will support you in creating that which you seek with more ease and less drama and confusion.

This is exactly what The Daily Nothing Intensive is about.                                                                 

Overwhelmed? Stuck? Unwind, get centered, clear and connected in 15 minutes by signing up for a FREE session.

I saw the angel in the Marble and carved until I set him free. - Michelangelo

The following is a chapter from my upcoming ebook The 9 to 5 Diet.

It is impossible for me to talk about weight loss without talking about energy. Our
physical body is only a tiny part of what we are made of. The human energy field (aka
aura) consists of seven layers; the first (closest to the physical body) layer is
associated with physical functioning and sensation— feeling physical pain or pleasure.

However, many physical imbalances, including weight issues, start way before they reach—
and are visible on—the first layer.

This explains why I was able to lose weight without dieting or counting calories: I had
started to address and heal emotional issues and belief systems that were
holding me back and that my body was actually registering as stress, causing me
to hold on to extra weight. Eventually, people started to approach me on the street
and ask how I had gotten so fit. This amused me because for the first time in my life,
I wasn’t thinking about what I was eating. Food had stopped being an issue. I was
eating foods I hadn’t eaten for years: red meat, cheese, pasta…

I’m sure that the fact that I had begun to eat only organic food made a difference,
but still, my relationship to food had changed significantly, from rigid to relaxed.
What really caused the shift was addressing problems in my energetic body.

We all walk through life carrying unresolved issues, charged memories, and judgments
in our energetic space. Often this clutter is most easily seen in a person’s face and
eyes. We all have seen “before” and “after” shots in advertisements for weight-loss
products and programs. When I look at a picture of myself from five years ago
(which I was hoping to post here but my scanner stopped working!!)
I see what I call Energetic Weight. I am not physically any heavier than I am now,
but I look overweight. It is almost like I am not even there, or
I’m hiding behind protective walls and veils that I’m not even aware of.

The more we commit to personal development and the alignment of our true essence,
the easier it becomes to ultimately forgive and let go of the past and enter fully into the
present moment. This shift is energetic, yet it will change the way you look, walk, and
hold your body. And the best part? The changes are permanent.

The following exercise will help you kick start energetic weight loss.

Judgment release 

“The fastest way to open the space for change is to release judgments and
the pent-up emotional energy around them so energy can move.
This seems so simple and yet societal conditioning has taught everyone to talk in
generalizations and to control emotions and thus lock up the free flow of experience.

Lost energy, lost love, lost power, lost anything is the result of denial,
of holding it away from you by not accepting it.
What was lost returns when you forgive yourself for denying it and accept it.
This does not mean forgiving yourself for the behavior.
It means accepting the behavior and forgiving yourself for not having
accepted it before as part of you and your learning experience.”
- Right Use of Will

Take a piece of paper, draw a line down the middle to divide it into two columns, and
write on the top left “What happened” and on the top right “Who needs to know.”
Then, get grounded, sit in stillness for few moments, and connect with an incident
that you still have an energetic charge about. It could be anything. Maybe it was a
painful memory from childhood, or an uncomfortable situation with a neighbor. Maybe
it is anger toward yourself. Whatever it is, try not to analyze it, but instead, let all that
charge and built-up energy flow through you onto the left-hand column. No need to
worry about spelling or how it all looks. Actually, the messier, the better! Keep writing.
If you run out of room, start from the top again and write over what you already wrote.
You will know when you are finished.

Write until you find yourself taking responsibility and seeing yourself clearly:

What happened that led you to react or feel hurt?

Ask yourself questions, such as: Could I have avoided that if I had done something
differently? Can I forgive myself for not recognizing the gift in this experience?

Then, write in the right-hand column who needs to know. It is usually the people
involved in the “what happened,” yourself, and/or Divine (or your true Self).

(And no need to actually tell these people about it.)

After you are done, sit in this place of forgiveness for a moment. Then burn the paper.
This is important to do right afterwards, to allow those remnants to leave your space
completely.

You will be surprised how powerful this simple tool is! Watch yourself the next time
something similar happens, or you run into the person you had the charge with. By
releasing negative emotions this way, you’ll free yourself to move through life with
ease and grace.

I did this exercise once with a client and the results were immediate. He wrote about
the resentment and anger he still holds toward his father, whom he hadn’t talked to for
years. After he burned the paper, he felt lighter right away. The next time I saw him,
he told me that his father had gotten really sick and needed his support. If he hadn’t
released the charge he still had, he would not have been able to show up for his father
like he did. My client explained how their relationship had completely changed and
they felt closer than ever before. Plus, his eating habits improved, which was the very
reason he had come to see me in the first place.

There are no limits what we can create when we start working with the level of energy.
Freedom comes from realizing that we are way more than just a body.

Whether you are looking to lose weight, bring in more clients or call in a sacred partnership,
by learning tools and techniques that help you see yourself as a Spirit will support you in creating that which you seek with more ease and less drama and confusion.

This is exactly what The Daily Nothing Intensive is about.

SUMMER 2012

Nothing’s Gonna Change Your World